Its Friday night right now. Almost a week since Isaac came home. And this is what I am seeing from my bed:
Sometimes I still can't believe my eyes. Sometimes I still can't believe I have a son. It was such a long road to just get pregnant in the first place and then the past 6 months seemed like an eternity. It was such a long time ago when I was pregnant and then again it seemed like I barely got that pregnant. Now it seems almost surreal that I have this sweet (well he is not so sweet all the time, hehe) little boy next to my bed and he is my son.I love watching him sleep. He is sleeping so well at home. Especially when he is being held. He totally deserves every minute of it after the long fight he fought to get home to us.
Isaac has been smiling more and more at home. He not only smiles in his sleep but he also shows us these big gummy grins when he is awake now. I dreamed about Rachel for the first time last night. I dreamed that she just came home with us but she was a 2 month old full term baby. She was much bigger than Isaac and she was not only smiling, she was giggling. I told Isaac, your sister is giggling already, when are you going to giggle? And I was worried that Isaac was going to be so much smaller than his sister in my dream. ^_^I just feel so blessed. I know I have been saying this so many times but I really can't describe how blessed I feel. How amazing God's grace is. I am so thankful that through Jesus, I can feel so blessed after walking through what seemed like fire. In March and April, I felt like I walked through the valley of the shadow of death but He restored my soul.
I just wanted to share a few passages that touched my heart tonight.
I Peter 1:6-7 --
In this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while you may have had to suffer grief in all kinds of trials. These have come so that your faith—of greater worth than gold, which perishes even though refined by fire—may be proved genuine and may result in praise, glory and honor when Jesus Christ is revealed.
Psalm 23 --
1 The LORD is my shepherd, I shall not be in want.2 He makes me lie down in green pastures,
he leads me beside quiet waters,3 he restores my soul.
He guides me in paths of righteousness
for his name's sake.4 Even though I walk
through the valley of the shadow of death,
I will fear no evil,
for you are with me;
your rod and your staff,
they comfort me.5 You prepare a table before me
in the presence of my enemies.
You anoint my head with oil;
my cup overflows.6 Surely goodness and love will follow me
all the days of my life,
and I will dwell in the house of the LORD
forever.
Sonia
Posts
8 comments:
I have been following your families' story for several months, I don't even remember how I stumbled across you blog. I have prayed for Isaac's health and homecoming. I am so excited to see him home and doing well. You have been truly blessed with a beautiful son and a fabulous little angel to follow Isaac through life.
May God continue to bless you.
Sherri
Washington State
Sonia,
I enjoyed your last post with the bible verses. I wondered how long it would take for you to really grasp your head around the fact that you truly ARE a Mommy. I knew that those six months in the hospital would seem to you like you were more of a nurse than a Mom. Now, you can enjoy the difference! Isaac does look very peaceful and happy in your most recent pictures. It is so nice to see him in softer light and in his own clothes and blankets. What a sweet, sweet, boy!!!!
Kristina
Woodstock, GA, USA
amen, sister! what a blessing isaac is, how honored our Lord is through your testimony- may He continue to be your shepherd through the adventures of parenthood that await you and jong!
I can't believe it has already been a week since he got home. He is looking better and better...but I bet you are tired. Your dream about Rachel is really wonderful. I lost my Mom last year and have only recently started dreaming about her. At first the dreams weren't happy, but they helped me work through the trama of loosing her. Now, when I dream of her we are able to talk about many things and they are happy dreams.
You and Jong are so blessed to have Isaac. I think God has big plans for that little person!
He really is too cute!
Hugs,
Susan
Sonia,
One more thing...I felt the same way when I delivered Sagan at 24 weeks...like I was only kind of pregnant! I am not sure the feeling has ever gone away! LOL!
S
Dear Sonia,
I am sorry it has been such a long time between comments. We have a new computer and it took me a long time to re-locate your blog site. I am so happy for you now that you have Isaac home. It has been a real blessing for me to watch your struggles and see how your faith has helped you through every hardship and trauma. Praise God, not only for Isaac's improvements but also for your outpouring of love, faith and commitment to him in every post.
I have never met you but through your post you and Jong and little Isaac feel like part of my family.
Love always Evelyn :)
This is the first time Miho has seen Isaac. (This is Mary showing her in Philly). Miho thinks Isaac is so precious and cute. She can't believe how big his eyes are! She wants you to know that she, as well as the rest of the family, is praying for you. God bless you.
Miho and Mary
P.S. I bookmarked your website so Miho can check it herself.
Hi Sonia,
please excuse my lack of knowledge, but in Wed 11 Oct post you mention both a Moby Wrap (which I am guessing is a used to strap the baby to you allowing you to "carry" the baby hands free) and a co-sleeper. Could you please tell me what a co-sleeper is and what it does.
Sorry to ask such a silly question.
Evelyn
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